Public Confession: #4


Although it’s been over a year, I love this blog that went viral. A 20-something guy attends a gay pride parade. As a Christian, he stands with others to hold signs that communicate his thoughts about Christianity and Homosexuals. Their signs read: “I’m sorry that Christians judge you,” “I’m sorry the way churches have treated you,” “I used to be a bible-banging homophobe, sorry.” Apology. Apologizing. Because some, who profess Love, serve the Author of Life, and answer the call to Love God and their Neighbor as Themselves . . . well. . . they hate. We hate.

                             

From director of Blue Like Jazzregarding his  soon-to-premier film, “One of the most consistent criticisms I got as a recording artist came from fellow Christians saying, ‘Why do you use these songs criticizing the church? Why would you go airing our dirty laundry for the public to see?’

This perspective has always amused me, as if the public thinks we’ve got our act together perfectly, as if they don’t already see the hypocrisy in our midst. They just think we’re too dumb to see it ourselves.

Which is why the image of a guy in a confession booth finally confessing the truth started my six-year-long quest to make Blue Like Jazz.

When we tell the truth – even the uncomfortable truth – the truth sets people free.

                              

Friend, world, precious human being, I’m sorry. I confess that I judged. I judged you by the way you look. I feared you because you’re different. At times, I’ve chosen to sit further away from you on the bus because you smelled. I avoided eye contact with you. I avoided talking to you. I acted ‘rich’ or ‘intelligent’ so you’d accept me. Or I smiled, way too self-righteously at you. I confess I didn’t love you as I love myself. I didn’t smile, hug, or praise you. I withheld relentless, unconditional Love to you. And I’ll admit, it was because I was – still am – afraid. I’m afraid of being vunerable. I’m fearful of being seen for who I REALLY AM. (it’s sooo NOT pretty!). I’ve been fearful that others would think ‘less of me.’

Because friend, I’m learning that I should be thought less of. The kind of Man/God I’m choosing to follow and model my life after saw people. He saw YOU for who YOU are. And accepts YOU just like that. (If I could be accepted, you’re a shoe-in, friend!) I admit that I have not, always, or ever. I’m sorry for the pain we, “Christians”, might have caused you. I’m sorry we made it rather confusing. I’m sorry you think we’re hypocrites. The good news is – I fully admit that I’m a hypocrite. A broken, broken, breaking person. Will you bear with me? Will you hang in there? Will you forgive me? I know, I’m supposed to ‘know’ these things, since I’m a Christ-follower and all, but my heart forgets Love and returns to selfishness all too easily.

And I need YOU,

                  world,

friend,

precious human being

to remind me

               that I only, truly see G-d

when I see you.

I’m sorry.

Original Public Confession post, which explains where this came from. Feel free to add, comment, share grace, rage violently against, journal further, seek time to process, or time to forgive, or join in. Really, I’d love if we could just share with the people we’ve wronged.

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Categories: Kingdom Coming Related, Public Confession | Tags: , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

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2 thoughts on “Public Confession: #4

  1. Terry

    I was blowin away by the hypocritical confession and terribly judgemental confession in blue like jazz and mostly by the complete blindness of Christians to see it. There is no remorse or pain in it at all, It is a confession of being enlightened not like those mean illiterate crusaders 700 years ago, The closest it comes to any kind of an authentic confession is I used to be like that am now I’m enlightened not like those awful judgemental Christians.

    • Yes. Blue Like Jazz was fantastic. It is a tough row to how, as it sounds a bit like, “I’m such a good christian, I CONFESS.” And then I’ve got my pride blowing up all over the place. Perhaps why private confession in the intimacy of friends scares me much more than public, non-intimate blog confessions…. Oh goodness….

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